As I write this month's column, the Cincinnati tournament is in full swing. In a few days, the Connecticut Open will begin. These signal the end of the hard court season tournaments and are preludes to the last Grand Slam of the calendar year, the U.S. Open. Around the area where I live many clubs are holding their end of season championships. Inter-club matches abound and many of these involve junior aged players.
 
While watching one of these junior quarterfinals, I witnessed one young man totally self-destruct. The player in question was up a set and was tied 3 all in the second set. For reasons unknown, this player's forehand (his weapon) began to fail him. Increasingly, he became more and more frustrated and angry. At one point, he threw his racquet down as he went to sit between game changeovers. It was at this point that I knew he would lose. Indeed, the final score was 4-6, 6-3, 6-1 in favor of his opponent.
 
In my opinion, both players were talented. However, the young man who lost his temper was favored to win, and I could see that he possessed better weapons in his tennis arsenal. However, his opponent was patient, cool, clam and collected even during the first set which he lost.
 
Prompted in part by observing this junior's self-destruction, I decided to dedicate this month's column to the mental side of the game.
 
I recall that Yogi Berra (the famous baseball player) was once quoted as saying: "Baseball is 90% mental. The other half is physical." Well despite Yogi's lack of Math prowess, I believe he is correct. So much of any sport is truly mental.
 
I suspect that many extremely talented players on both tours have the physical capabilities and talent to win a Grand Slam event. However, surviving seven matches and the mental stress that each match presents make the difference between the very good players and the champions.
 
Tennis is a unique game when playing singles. The individual player is out there on his or her own. There are no timeouts, and coaching (even when permitted) is limited. For better or worse, the singles player stands or falls on her or his own merits or lack thereof. For me, this is one of the most engaging and exciting aspects of this great game! It wasn't always that way for me.
 
Some years back, I wrote an e-book entitled, Perfect Tennis. It addressed the mental aspects of tennis and how I was able to raise the quality of my game by using and employing these techniques. I was blessed and sold over 1000 copies of the book. The e-mail questions and comments that I received affirmed that this aspect of the game is clearly of interest to most if not all players. I was flattered that so many of the purchasers of this book e-mailed me with their own success stories.
 
So, I am going to give a brief overview of one component of the information that I presented in this book. It is my hope that as seasons end north of the equator and begin south of the equator that the reader will take time and "work" on this important component in the complete tennis game package.
 
Control Your Thoughts On and Off the Court
 
Perception is reality!!! What you think affects what you feel, and what you feel affects what you think. The two are intimately interconnected. Ultimately, thoughts and feelings lead to the formation of perceptions. The old example of viewing a glass half empty or half full comes to mind when illustrating how different perspectives on a common reality can be.
 
It is difficult to control one's feelings. They come upon us quickly and seemingly spontaneously. Before we know it, they have taken control of our thoughts. Once thoughts and feelings are aligned and in sync, perceptions are formed. If a perception lingers with us long enough and is not changed, it eventually becomes a belief. Beliefs are very difficult to change. Negative beliefs lead to diminished performance and lowered self-esteem. Positive beliefs lead to confidence building, excitement and usually self-satisfaction.
 
Notice that I have not spoken at all about results! No one wins all of her or his matches. Indeed, 50% of all players lose their matches. We all want to win. This is normal in competition and should be a motivating factor. However, winning should not be a factor in determining perceptions. A player can lose a match and walk away with some very positive perceptions. A player can win a match and not have positive perceptions. I know this seems a strange statement, but consider the following.
 
I am sure that there are players who the reader could be reasonably certain of beating 90 to 95% of the time. If these were the only players you faced in your competitive tennis world, you would certainly have confidence. But, would you really be satisfied? Would you really enjoy the game? Would you have any sense of real accomplishment? Would you be forced to see how good your tennis game could become?
 
However, learning to control one's thoughts and feelings is risky. It may take time, and you may not be successful at all times. But, are you willing to take a risk on yourself?
 
You cannot control the ball, the point, or the match until you control yourself and your perceptions. It is easy to control your perceptions when you are "playing down" against lesser players. Playing against a Roger Federer or a Simone Halep would require a daunting perception to say the least... in effect, the tables would be turned.
 
I would argue that you cannot learn to control your thoughts and feelings on the court until you can control them off the court. Indeed, I would posit that practicing controlling thoughts and emotions off the court is actually good practice for on court control.
 
An important key to realizing self-control of thoughts and feelings is to realize that the conscious mind can only think of one thing at a time.
 
Whenever a negative thought or feeling enters your mind throughout the day try the following:

1. Recognize and acknowledge that it is a negative thought.


2. Tell yourself that the negative thought or feeling is temporary and that it can and will pass. (You may want to say this aloud when initially practicing this technique. In time, you will not need to say this aloud.)


3. Think of any other thought or feeling that is not negative. (Simply distract your mind from the thought or feeling by replacing it with something else. It can be anything. For example, you might focus your attention on the color of an item of clothing that you or someone else is wearing. You could focus your mind on the sweep second hand of your watch and even count seconds as it moves. You could ask yourself a question like: "What would I really like for dinner tonight?") If you are dealing with a negative feeling, think of something that makes you happy. (For example, I love going to the beach. I feel relaxed and happy near the water. When I feel a negative feeling coming on such as fear, anger, resentment, etc., I simply close my eyes and think of being at the beach to change my conscious thinking.) Remember, thoughts and feelings are intimately interconnected.


4. Move on to thoughts that are future tense oriented. Once the negative thought or feeling has been "neutralized," think about something new that needs to be done in the immediate future. If possible, take immediate action towards completing this future tense task.


5. Go back onto "autopilot." Most of the time, we are not using our conscious mind in a focused manner when negative thoughts or feelings begin to creep. For example, it is almost impossible to think negatively or feel down when reading a book (assuming you are truly reading). Why? Our conscious mind is totally occupied with what we are reading. However, much of the time, we are on autopilot when negative items find their way into our minds. For example when we drive a car, we are on autopilot. In truth, our non-conscious mind is driving the vehicle. It is during these "autopilot" times of day that our conscious mind is most susceptible to negative thoughts and feelings. (In tennis, we have those moments between point and during changeovers when our conscious mind has the opportunity to be "infiltrated" with negative thoughts and emotions.)